Edges, Yoga and The Unknown

 I am fascinated by edges, by what’s possible in this human form. How far can we push our bodies? What is the limit of our intellectual and psychic capacity? Where do we begin to meet mental limits? I am certain that we all have far more capacity than we can possibly understand and our limits are just that, our own imaginations. I know because I’ve played on those edges, and I’ve been witness to thousands of people doing more than they thought imaginable.

 

The going beyond – some is possible because of sheer willpower, another is because of doing something that matters, and sometimes it’s simply never been tried.  Beyond that is just surrendering to the moment. And then there’s Grace, and allowing things to happen, getting out of our own way. To put it another in a bumper sticker form – “Let Go and Let God” (in whatever form God means to you).

 

My perspective comes primarily from several decades of being involved with ultra-endurance sports. Cycling events that last 12, 18, 36 hours and longer; running events that are multiple stages; adventure races that span a week. I’ve been a race and participant, event organizer, race director, volunteer, coach, and trainer. I know the realms of endurance and edges and pushing farther as well as anyone.

 

When we go to edges, we go to the unknown. We can see the horizon, but to go beyond the horizon that is something else. Do we stay in what we see and know, or do we try something new, something unknown?

 

For the past several years my favorite yoga classes, primarily taught by Kelly Larson, Kirsten Warner, and Sofia Diaz, have been very hard for me to describe and put in words. They are not the flow of vinyasa, they are not the 26 pose sequence of Bikram, they are not prop-based Iyengar, they are not the quiet of yin. They have elements of Hatha Yoga, but that’s only a start. We use familiar poses, and there is always something new. In these classes we often hold poses for a longer period of time, sometimes minutes. Some of them are more traditional poses, some are ones I’m never done in any other class, some are from the Qi Gong tradition. Many of them generate a lot of heat, most give the muscles a good burn!

The teachers and the poses draw on our devotion and inspiration to shine as who we are.

 

While we hold these poses, I often hear the idea that ‘the yoga’ begins when you want out of the pose. When doing ultra-endurance sports, you inevitably reach a point during a race or a ride where you wonder ‘What the hell am I doing here? Why?’ That’s when everything changes.

 

One of the best pieces of advice I ever received was during a race when I reached that point of quitting, my coach said ‘just one more mile and then you can stop.’ It was the fall of 1997 and I was racing the Furnace Creek 508, a nonstop 500 mile bike race through Death Valley. The race did not start well for me. About 14 hours into the race I was riding at night on an uphill in front my support vehicle when I just stopped in the middle of the road and hung my head. My coach was in the support van as part of my crew, so he came out and asked what was wrong. I said I was done – done with cycling, done with endurance sports, I was ready to quit and go home. His reply was simple: ‘ok, that’s fine. Just ride another mile first’. I was far too tired and out of it to argue, so I continued. A mile later apparently I had forgotten what was so important just a few minutes earlier. (I did finish the race.)

 

In a similar way during these yoga classes, the teachers know the thoughts are mounting to want to move out of the pose. The teachers invite us to take one more breath, to hold for just one more second. To remain in the heat, to feel the burn. To relax and surrender into it, and do it for something that matters. In that same instant of wanting to release from the posture you are stepping into the edge, breathing into the unknown, a place you’ve never been before. Reaching into the unknown is an element of the power of it, it is also the grace of it, and it’s a place we often move with fear.

 

Hardly anyone begins down the path of ultra-endurance sports with the idea of going far in mind. Most start small and make incremental steps. At some point most people reach there desired goal, and in fact don’t know there’s more.  And there are the handful who continue on. Of course no one tells you what you’re really in for – edges, transformation, discovering your power, surrender into the moment, finding the unknown – all in a relatively subtle, and yet fully lived, reality of the sport and the moments.

 

These yoga classes I love so much have a similar feel. It’s not a place to start for most and no one is deliberately aiming for them, but once you do one you’ll know if it calls to you. It’s difficult to describe what actually happens and why I keep going, though somehow I may have just given it a feel.

 

Almost everyone I know who has embarked down the course of these yoga classes or ultra-endurance sports is immensely enriched in spirit, in personality, in their being by their experience.

 

This is a rare piece that is cathartic in its own way for me, as I find a piece of why I’m drawn in. In that same recognition, I appreciate why some people dip their toe in and find other pursuits.

 

I’m drawn to the edges, to the unknown. As I’m sure I will always be.

The horizon is but a line to be crossed, not a limit to be reached. Hope to see you on the other side of the horizon.